non sequitur

So it comes to this. I’m not surprised actually, perhaps a little disappointed but never the less I’m not surprised. The truth is I should have known long ago. Of course it has taken quite some time for sufficient information to fill in enough of the gaps to see what it was that I was looking at. Looking at not looking for, let’s be clear about that. Obviously the mind has a way of letting us see what we want to even when nothing closely resembling that is actually before our eyes. The mind and the heart.

Fortunately, or not perhaps, time has a way of wearing all things down, and without proper maintenance, proper TLC if you will, even the most elaborate façade will begin to erode, exposing any flaws or inherent weaknesses in the structure. That of course doesn’t mean without a veneer there is less value or less desire, save only that what flaws there are, are now known. It is then to the viewer to make that call for themselves what is beauty and worthy of possession. What may be unwanted by one may be invaluable to another.

Perspective too should be considered. Viewed at one angle rather than another, what is seen could easily be unrecognizable from the next or so unique as to be surprising that it was not previously observed. It is then duty of the observer not the observed to fully explore orientation and position before fully casting judgment. Could one place cast shadow over a flaw that when brought to the light of day, rend it undesirable? Can that flaw be overlooked? Is there a way to repair it or does the flaw add or embellish character?

We admire roses for their sweet fragrant flowers, soft velvet petals, and rich vibrant colors despite their thorns that can prick us, draw blood and inflict pain. It is therefore the requirement of the gardener to learn how to handle the rose, to protect themselves, to respect the rose from a distance or to risk injury for rewards sake.

A dilapidated building with a structure intact can prove a valuable reward to those who through their effort rebuild to its former grandeur. Unforeseen problems however can slowly wear at those who would otherwise seek to repair that which is already itself worn down. Thus requiring a second choice: continue the work at hand and adjust to accommodate the new problems, the hope begin that the total of the repairs will be completed and the finished structure will provide haven for the weary, or focus efforts inward replenishing the worn, salving wounds prepared to begin work anew when better days come. The risk involved and the dilemma presented is a judgment of how much work the new problems present as opposed to the available resources to complete the task at hand, this met with a third judgment as to how many more ‘unforeseen’ problems still exist, once naively unexpected and now cautiously anticipated, the result of which would further diminish an already compromised pool of resources, prolong the completion and exacerbate the exhaustion of the weary. As this cycle progresses an additional judgment enters into the process to either abandon the project at hand, accepting defeat for having too long neglected the original façade allowing too many exposed flaws and having entered into the endeavor with insufficient ability or resources to ever acceptably complete the repairs or to persevere and continue, despite insurmountable odds, knowing full well that the path chosen may well be your end.

Then ask yourself am I the one repairing or the one being repaired?