You can, but WOULD you?!?

Postulate - There has been the debate that sex and love are completely separate things, and that both can be had without the other. I would concede that the above statement is partially true but fails to address the reality of this world which is if they are mutually exclusive can they not also be mutually inclusive and what combination is most preferred? The answer depends on what it is that you are looking for in the first place and what you want long term. The reasoning behind the answer may also highlight the difference between gender and sexual orientation and the way each uniquely, or not, approach the question.

Sex without Love - It is most certainly possible to have sex without love. Sex comes in many forms, regardless of what your definition of 'is' is, and its most basic form requires no love at all, masturbation. Certainly you can love yourself as you please yourself but that certainly doesn't have to be the case. Nightly, more common on the weekend, loveless sex can be found in the form of the one-night-stand. While in the long term love may be formed between the individuals involved this would violate the premise of the one-night-stand. Gay men quite commonly find this the most convenient form of mutual sex with no strings attached, not the least of which would be love. Of course in the most ferocious form of sex, rape, rarely if ever has any connection with the mutual concern for well-being, and deep emotional bond associated with love. Probably more common between a heterosexual pair, this is likely due to the difference perceptions and values placed not only on sex but the other individual involved. Unfortunately there are those that would condemn all of the above forms of sex as they do not adhere to the biblical directive that creates a sin for all of the above actions.

Love without Sex - Certainly love without the physical intimacy that sex brings between two individuals is entirely possible. However it is important to qualify what love is and how it differentiates across a spectrum. It is possible to love a thing, a place, or an idea without ever even considering the impossible concept of sex with that item. Religious figures commit their love to God and therefore what they can never achieve in the physical is said to be made up for in the spiritual. Even the love of other individuals is more often than not never more than love. The love between parents and their off-spring, siblings and even close friends are taboo to cross the line with sexual physical contact more extreme than a kiss or an embrace. During traditional courting periods, again the emotional bond and unifying love between two individuals develops before physical intimacy, particularly in the most conservative adherences.

Sex with Love - The love between two adult individuals is unique. In the instance of clergy, blood family and platonic friendships, introducing sex with their love would be more destructive than unitive. Sex between two grown and emotionally mature people has the power to bring those two closer as a result of the shared experience. It is the fact that these two individuals love each other that drives them to want the other person to experience as much pleasure, if not more, as they do themselves. The compounding effect can make the sexual experience more intense, and thus more pleasurable for all involved.

And - Beyond the physical pleasure felt during sex lies the emotional or spiritual intimacy involved. Because those in love often want more for the one they love than their own well being, sex provides one of the few win-win-win situations. As acknowledged earlier, sex on its own is pleasurable, and thus is expected to be pleasurable for both individuals involved. That pleasure can be intensified, if the fact that one is pleasing the other, is by itself a pleasurable feeling. This intensification can compound upon itself developing a crescendo of pleasure, to a climax of the sexual experience.

Therfore - It would be easy to deduce then that while love and sex can exist as mutual exclusive states of being that when combined they create a powerful experience unparalleled in by either of the two alone. Many conditions and considerations need to be accounted for the ideal situation but even in the imperfect can be at the minimum no less enjoyable than in the absence of one or the other. Ability to provide the physical and desire to be selfless in caring for the other create a sensation that should leave one thinking, "well sure I could, but why would I?!?"